Bedside Manner
by Mockingbird Quester
Summary: James T. Kirk suffers a personal loss, and Dr. McCoy is the one who has to inform him of it. Gen or maybe K/M pre-slash if you squint ;


Summary: James T. Kirk suffers a loss, and Leonard McCoy is the one who has to inform him of it.

It's been roughly 4 hours since James T. Kirk and Spock saved the Earth. In the aftermath, the ship crew had been sleeping, celebrating by replicating various alcoholic drinks and many had ended up in quarters that were not their own. Right now, everyone was feeling relieved after the stress and tension of the past two days.

McCoy knew that that wouldn't last. Soon they would be back on Earth, being grilled by Starfleet command and facing a largely empty academy. The reality of their friends who had died would hit these young people soon enough.

Leonard was checking messages from Starfleet when he discovered there was a list of all crew members whose ships had been destroyed by Nero in Vulcan space, in the same trap The Enterprise would have fallen into without Jim's insight into the lightening storm. He began scanning the list, finding the names of far too many classmates and medical professors he had worked with while at the academy. Then one name made him pause, and begin cursing steadily.

"It can't be! There's no goddamned way!!"

But it was. There in plain text was Science Technician Winona Kirk, and she was on the list as a "presumed casualty".

"Aw… Dammit all to hell.! Damn! Damn! Damn!!!" he cried, putting his head in his hands. After realizing he couldn't delay letting Jim know what he had found, he went to search out the young captain.

McCoy found Jim sleeping in his quarters, and was relieved. It would have been hard to pull him off the bridge, or out of the rec area.

"Hey Jim. Wake up!"

The only response was a groan as Jim pulled the blanket up over his head.

"C'mon Jim. I've got to talk to you."

At that, Jim finally appeared from under the covers and blinked owlishly. "Aww Bones… What the hell are you doin' here and it better be an emergency."

"CMO override of locks idiot. Jim, I've got to tell you something, and you aren't gonna like it." was his answer.

Jim looked suddenly serious. "Hey Bones, your accent is coming through. That's usually a really bad sign. Tell me."

Now that he had Jim's attention, Leonard wasn't sure how to proceed. *C'mon, what was all that medical training for? You've had to tell patient's family that they are dead before.* But they weren't his best friend.

"Jim, do you know where you mother was currently stationed?"

"Somewhere in Starfleet. Usually on a colony developing environmental technology. I send a message and she gets it eventually."

"Did she respond to the message you sent her after we got on board The Enterprise?"

"Not that I know of. But I really hadn't had time to check…"

"Jim, she was a science officer on one of the Academy ships. I'm sorry."

Jim sat silently for long moments before muttering "No way. No fuckin' way!"

McCoy sat beside him, putting a hand gently on his shoulder. After a few minutes, he heard a broken voice saying "Bones, can I be alone for awhile, please?"

"Let me know if you need me." he responded, and quietly left the room. He stood outside the door, until he heard the sound of harsh, choking sobs. He then went by the bridge, informed them of the situation, and asked that the Captain not be disturbed unless it was an emergency.

He had worried about Spock's own reaction to the news of Jim's loss, so similar to his own, but he hadn't needed to be, even assuming the cold hearted elf had any empathy. Spock was apparently holed up with Sarek and some of the elders, trying to help his father heal after the sudden dissolution of his own life bond. From his own medical reading, he knew that a Vulcan who had lost his mate often followed them in death without family and healers to help anchor them to the living.

McCoy was in medbay later that night when Jim came by and sat down beside him. He led him into his office, assuming they would need some privacy.

" I see you told the bridge." he commented. "If one more person offers me condolences, I swear I'm going to hit something."

They sat silently together until Jim finally said, "Do you think it's karma, 'cause of what I said to Spock about his mom?"

The medical officer thought for a moment on how to respond, then decided tact wasn't his forte anyway. "Jim, she was already gone by then - you just didn't know it."

"Yeah, that's true. Bones… I had a message from her, from before."

"What did it say?"

"That she was proud of me for serving on The Enterprise despite my suspension. I guess she knew about it. She was always keeping track of me through friends she had in the higher ups. She knew a lot of officers after my dad's death."

"Hmmm… I guess you didn't tell her I drugged you and brought you on as a stowaway practically."

"Nah. I learned a long time ago that my mom didn't need to know everything."

"True for any mother, Jim."

"Yeah… Mom said not to be a hero. That she expected to see me when we all got back Earthside and she wasn't gonna go through the memorials and everything they had after Dad died. I guess they'll have one for her and the other Starfleet who died instead."

Suddenly Jim made a choking sound and said "Bones, I was such a screw up growing up. She was always so worried about me, even if she was always working. Now she'll never know I made captain or anything."

"Jim, she was proud of you. She would be even more proud of you now."

A snort was his response. "Bones, she would be fuckin' terrified! She hated the thought of me going up in space. Thought I would end up like my father!!"

"Well, you've already survived longer than him and saved more lives. I still think she would be proud of you."

"Yeah, I guess…"

"Want to stay in one of the biobeds until we hit planetside? I can always say you have some minor injuries to recover from."

"Thanks, Bones."

"Just rest…"

So what if Jim always claimed his bedside manner left a lot to be desired. When it came to his friends, McCoy knew all that mattered was being there.


End file.
